Painful Truth

Don’t waste your time on someone who doesn’t appreciate you the way you should be appreciated. Don’t ever settle for mediocrity, for being just an option, for being the one who’s just fun to be with, for being the one who’s always there desperately waiting, for mere concern or pity, for someone who likes you just because s/he knows s/he’s got the power to break you. Don’t settle because deep down…you know who you are and you know without a doubt that you deserve better if not the best. Recently, I have been reading this countless times, trying to grapple the honesty behind the simple message. Oftentimes I have found myself ensnared in this situation, hoping to get out yet finding myself being sucked deeper and deeper into this small box. It’s depressing because I know I do not deserve certain circumstances, but my stubbornness makes me want to test my limitations. In the end, I allow myself to feel like a worthless failure even though I know I am not. I failed a lot of times before but this is the only struggle wherein I feel like I can no longer fight and get up. I know if I become honest about my situation, my friends would wonder why I am still in this stupid mess in the first place. I miss them. For when I am with them, I forget that I have to deal with my foolish and childish ways. I am not strong. I never was. I just try to be one. I have to. I feel so alone. Behind those ‘haha’s and ‘hehe’s is something so much more.

*^&^@!#$&(

 

 I feel crazy and bored.

Back in the Game

 If I will be doing press releases from now to eternity, I should at least practice right? and I am back in the game! Back to being a writer at heart.♥

let Le Love Speak

I miss you so much that it's driving me crazy!

credits: www.leloveimage.blogspot.com

Job Interview

After nearly two months of bumming around at home, I finally had another job interview in Makati (the business capital of the Philippines). I was excited and nervous at the same time. I applied in one of my favored companies, Rustan Marketing Corporation. Rustan's holds a variety of products which usually caters to the upper class. Their products would include Elizabeth Arden, Maidenform, Lacoste, Arrow and so on. Back to my story. I met my future boss who was a graduate of Ateneo (my favored university). She just turned 22 and started working with Rustan's last December. Kristel was very bubbly and I felt very at ease with her the moment she let me seat in one of the chairs in her cubicle. I already saw myself working at the same cubicle and mingling with the other employees surrounding the space. She warned me of the work load I will be facing if I accept the offer but I knew there is no easy job in the world! The solution to stress would always be a choice of two - either you're in dire need of survival or you just love what you're doing, that's why you can't leave your work. I would most likely go for choice number 2 since I am not so much in the survival level yet, thank God! So there it goes, yadda yadda. Stories, blah blah blah. I got to know more or less the company and the work I will be engaging in and guess what, I loved it to bits! It's the sort of thing you are willing to do even with less pay. Then my dream suddenly evaporated into thin air when I saw my batchmate as I made my way out of the office. Gah! we were going for the same position and only one will be chosen! Then my self-confidence dropped to negative zero! what will make Kristel and the company choose me?? This girl in front of me has better credentials than me! She has achieved a lot in the past four years, what's my edge? I started praying, started telling my friends to pray for me because I really love the job. I leave it all up to God now. Hopefully my future entries will be about how much I either enjoy my work at Rustan Marketing Corporation or how much I feel deprived of social action because of tedious requirements. Till then.